We’re feeling happy when we have what we want and it can be anything, Like when we graduate from school or when we get a job or when we can win a race or when we become a champion or when we beat our competitor, or when we destroy our enemy. But maybe sometimes to be happy doesn’t need to make other people sad or upset, it can be when we can eat everyday or when we can see person that we love or when we can doing our hobby or when we can rest or when met old friend. To be happy is easy thing to do because to be happy just need to fulfill our need. So we don’t need to learn to be happy.
We’re feeling upset when we don’t get what we want, other people mess with us, the climate is not right, and many thing that can cause it. And when upset usually we doing something that we will regret later or something that destructible, or something that unreasonable or even something that against the law. But sometimes the effect is hidden in our feeling like we feel depressed, easy to angry or feel very energized and many other effect.
Actually there are 3 main reason why we become upset, there are :
a. everything is not everlasting (sabbe sankhârâ aniccâ)
This reason is actually simple and happened because we want to keep our stuff always good or keep good friend is around us, or in more specific is we want to keep our condition is still the same. But when it’s changed or broken then it will make us upset.
b. everything is grasp by sadness (sabbe sankhârâ dukkhâ)
This reason is actually simple and happened when we born then sadness will haunted us because there are no everlasting happiness or in bright side there are no everlasting sadness. And Happy and Sad is change every time, but if we don’t aware it then we will become upset.
c. everything is without self (sabbe dhammâ anattâ)
This reason is actually simple and happened when we want to claim something or even someone as ours, it like when we see good stuff and want that stuff become ours. But we didn’t get it then we will become upset.
Now we known what make us upset, and then we need to know way to remove or lessened upset. The way is actually simple, just be patient and acceptance. Patient it mean when we don’t get what we want then just wait someday we will get it, or when we had sadness then just wait because it will change. And acceptance is mean when we don’t get it until our tolerance time then accept it that thing or people is not for us, and let it go.
source : tripitaka